Tuesday 12 July 2011

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  • rsdang
    08-11 05:19 PM
    If you don't laugh at the end of reading this then there's something wrong with you... Just imagine sitting in traffic on your way to work
    and hearing this. Many Chicago folks DID hear this on the WBAM FM morning show in Chicago. The DJs play a game where they award winners great
    prizes. The game is called "Mate Match." The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are married or seriously involved with someone. If the
    contestant answers "yes," he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personal questions. The person is also asked to divulge the name of
    their partner (with phone number) for verification. If their partner answers those same three questions correctly, they both win the prize. One
    particular game, however, several months ago made the Windy City drop to its knees with laughter and is possibly the funniest thing I've heard
    yet. Anyway, here's how it all went down:


    DJ: Hey! This is Edgar on WBAM. Have you ever heard of Mate Match?

    Contestant: (laughing) Yes, I have.

    DJ: Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to Orlando, Florida if you win. What is your name? First only please.

    Contestant: Brian.

    DJ: Brian, are you married or what?

    Brian: Yes.

    DJ: Yes? Does that mean you're married or you're what?

    Brian: (laughing nervously) Yes, I am married.

    DJ: Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please.

    Brian: Sarah.

    DJ: Is Sarah at work, Brian?

    Brian: She is gonna kill me.



    DJ: Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?


    Brian: (laughing) Yes, she's at work.

    DJ: Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?

    Brian: She is gonna kill me.

    DJ: Brian! Stay with me here!


    Brian: About 8 o'clock this morning.

    DJ: Atta boy, Brian.

    Brian: (laughing sheepishly) Well...

    DJ: Question #2 - How long did it last?

    Brian: About 10 minutes.

    DJ: Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said that if a trip wasn't at stake.

    Brian: Yeah, that trip sure would be nice.

    DJ: Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this morning?

    Brian: (laughing hard) I, ummm, I, well...

    DJ: This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?

    Brian: Not that it was all that great, but her mom is staying with us for a couple of weeks...

    DJ: Uh huh...

    Brian: .and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time.

    DJ: Atta boy, Brian.

    Brian: On the kitchen table.

    DJ: Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous hundred times I've done it. Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get this wife's
    work number and call her up. You listen to this.


    (3 minutes of commercials follow)


    DJ: Okay audience, let's call Sarah, shall we?


    (touch tones... ringing...)


    Clerk: Kinkos.

    DJ: Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?

    Clerk: This is she.

    DJ: Sarah, this is Edgar with WBAM. We are live on the air right now and I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now.

    Sarah: (laughing) A couple of hours?

    DJ: Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to give any answers away! or you'll lose. Sooooooo... do you know the rules of
    MateMatch?

    Sarah: No.

    DJ: Good!

    Brian: (laughing)

    Sarah: (laughing) Brian, what the hell are you up to?

    Brian: (laughing) Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest.

    DJ: Yeah yeah yeah. Sure.. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. ! If your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of you will be of To
    Orlando, Florida for 5 ! days on us. Disney World. Sea World. Tickets to the Magic's game. The whole deal. Get it Sarah?

    Sarah: (laughing) Yes.

    DJ: Alright. When did you last have sex, Sarah?

    Sarah: Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work.

    DJ: What time?

    Sarah: Around 8 this morning.


    DJ: Very good. Next question. How long did it last?

    Sarah: 12, 15 minutes maybe.

    DJ:! Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect his manhood. We've got one last question, Sarah. You are one question away
    from a trip to Florida. Are you ready?

    Sarah: (laughing) Yes.

    DJ: Where did you have it?

    Sarah: OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that, did you?

    Brian: Just tell him, honey.

    DJ: What is bothering you so much, Sarah?

    Sarah: Well, it's just that my mom is! vacationing with us and...

    DJ: Come on Sarah... where did you have it?

    Sarah: In the butt...

    (long pause)

    DJ: Folks, we need to take a station break





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  • nogc_noproblem
    08-29 09:03 PM
    Dog Philosophy

    � The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue. - Anonymous

    � Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

    � The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. - Andy Rooney

    � Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate. - Sigmund Freud

    � Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul - - chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth! - Anne Tyler

    � If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

    � If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only two of them. - Phil Pastoret





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  • damialok
    04-08 01:27 AM
    No, I aint a realtor but just a savvy investor who is waiting for his GC and wants to make passive income. I dont suggest ppl to buy 3 homes. What I wanted to convey is that in my humble opinion, its one way to make money while you wait for GC. Be judicious and assume risk based on your tolerance levels. I felt that if I could present folks with real life examples of making money, thats a compelling statement,.

    And since Uncle Sam provides tax benefits that include interest deductions and capital gains waivers, its a very viable option.

    My point is, think of your home as an investment that also serves as a place to reside.

    Figuratively, this is like a Thanksgiving Day sale and the door busters are already gone!





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  • desi485
    08-05 08:06 PM
    Hey Bro! Think of you this way.

    You are no different than those trying to move from EB3 to EB2. They are doing this to get GC faster then others.

    You are stopping others from entering in your line, to get GC faster. :p

    Ultimately you both are the same.

    I am sure he doesn't have a mirror, only a desire to get GC and at any cost. He is using weird arguments to reach his goal and keeping others out of EB2. In way, he is cheating himself too.

    He should pay attention to real issues like per country quota, retrogression and so on.



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  • sanjaymk
    08-05 05:34 PM
    no joke list is complete without little johnny's joke..here is one. This is the only decent one that I found which will not get me into trouble here..

    Little Johnny's teacher asks, "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Do any of you know why his father didn't punish him?"

    Little Johnny replies, "Because George was the one holding the axe?





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  • bugmenot
    09-27 07:05 PM
    The immigration issue is controlled by the members of the senate and house, the president has little control over it, Bush has been pro immigration but that wasn't enough for him to get what he wanted, he couldn't even increase the h1b's that he kept publicly talking about.

    I doubt a democratic president would do any better.



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  • lfwf
    08-06 04:19 PM
    I thought you ported pascal's id :)

    :D





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  • americandesi
    04-15 06:37 PM
    3. Will the stress level increase after buying the house (again worried for making payments, losing jobs). Is it worth it.



    It's definetly not worth it. Here's an artice on one such riches to rags story.

    http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/personal/03/27/foodbank.family/

    As per the article "She has had to take extreme measures to pay for her interest-only mortgage of $2,500 a month"



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  • akred
    06-24 12:04 AM
    I am shocked to see the HOA cost in CA, Why is HOA so high there, Obviously CA does not get snow like East coast for 4-6 months, so snow mowing and salt sprinkling(which is expensive) is ruled out.
    Just to mow lawn, gardening and keeping tab on overall resident development you pay $400/month..Thats ridiculously high...BTW,I am not from CA, excuse my ignorance.


    HOA dues depend on many factors. The community may have maintenance or upkeep expenses that are out of the ordinary. Or the board may be building up reserves for future expenses that may be as much as 25 years down the line. Sometimes the board is dysfunctional and will take the easy way out of charging more dues instead of optimizing expenses.

    Before you buy into a HOA, get the minutes of the last year's board meetings and read through them to see if it is the kind of place you'd want to live in.





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  • alterego
    09-27 10:39 AM
    I wish Obama wins. His team has more clarity on many issues and he has the zeal like JFK for making things happen. But, a big but - I am very concerned about our Employment Based immigration. If he gets to win (I wish he does..as someone who want to see America regain it's global position not just with might but also being morally right), I am worried if it would be Sen. Durbin who will dictate the immigration policy.

    I wish we get some clarity in this aspect. In the economic downturn, I wish to work more than I ever did and see that US comes out of recession fast. But for that I have to be inside the country first. I have to be given a fair chance to contribute to this economy first and I need to be treated with respect and honor.


    Sen. Durbin's position on this issue and his closeness to Sen. Obama is certainly a cause for concern, however, one thing I have noticed over and over with Sen. Obama is that he is a cerebral pragmatist with a fairly decent judgement. He is not a locked in ideologue, when a rational argument is put to him he tends not to be dogmatic like the current president and instead will try to cut a deal.
    To get the support of republican moderates in any CIR legislation pro business immigration policies will need to be included in an Obama administration. No doubt the legislation will include some H1b restrictions, but they may be more open to EB visa recapture etc. That will atleast get those in the 485 queue some relief. Noone can reason with the Sen. Sessions and Rep. Kings of the congress. The same group that is so ultra conservative that they basically openly revolted with their president on numerous issues including the current economic rescue package.
    My fear with a Sen. McCain administration is that on the immigration issue, whatever his personal views, we will see another 4 yrs similar to the last 4 on immigration! He will get nowhere moving his party either. Pres. Bush is about as pro CIR as they come, he tried and tried very hard, but to no avail with the Congress. Even before the election, you can see the disagreements between McCain and the extreme right wing conservatives. Atleast with Obama, the scene will be shaken up, noone knows where it ends up, but atleast there is a chance the gridlock will be broken.



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  • unitednations
    08-02 06:09 PM
    Thanks for the quick reply. I never overstayed my I-94 either before leaving US or re-entering US. But just a thought... Do you mean if somebody covered by 245(i) and never left US after filing the labor before April 2001, still be eligible to adjust status?
    Thanks


    Yes.

    A little unknown thing is that even if you get married to someone who is eligible for 245i; you also get that benefit. Even if someone divorced a person who was eligible for 245i; they still get the benefit.

    Therefore, someone who has overstayed, out of status and marries someone who had a labor or 130 pending before april 30, 2001 (even though this person was never out of status or overstayed); then spouse can claim 245i benefit.





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  • gk_2000
    07-29 05:51 PM
    100 thousand is not for a president to worry about. But 11-12 Million is a different story..



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  • nogc_noproblem
    08-06 06:28 PM
    Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other, "Does this taste funny to you?"

    NO RED DOT (with comment - Racist Joke) FOR THIS JOKE PLEASE ;)





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  • msp1976
    04-08 09:00 AM
    Would you???
    of course not....
    The provision defeats the purpose of whole whistle blower clause...



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  • sledge_hammer
    03-24 10:09 AM
    Dude, it does not matter what you're reasoning is for getting into consulting. You do not even need to prove anything to me. Take your justification with you and present it to the guys that are going to approve your GC, NOT me!!!!

    If you are still so hard headed that you do not want to accept realities, what can I say!

    Dear Sledge_hammer,

    Dont just hammer around. The people who are doing consulting is not doing it out of their choice. It is the economy it forced some of us into consulting (fulltime to the company we work for but work for a client). In 2001, when we came out of school and tech bubble burst, there was no fulltime jobs, we were forced to do consulting. Some of my freinds who graduated in 2000 got into microsoft, oracle, cisco who didnt had damn good GPA. The guys who had 4.0 GPA and graduated a semester later didnt get those offers, coz bubble burst by that time.

    I am forced to tell you that the guys who are doing fulltime jobs working in same technology and same companies and doing same thing everyday are by no means smarter than the consultants who work in different industries, different technologies and enjoy their work. I would challenge the guys to come out and find a job faster than a consultant with same amount of experience.

    Luck By Chance doesnt give them a right to cry foul on consultants everyday....I am really sorry if i hurt anybodys feelings. I was forced by some of our fellow members. You have lot of other things to talk about. Dont blame consultants for your misery. If you are destined to suffer, you will suffer one or other way.

    I would advice all FTE's to be prepared for unexpected twists and turns in bad economy.





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  • gclabor07
    08-05 11:48 AM
    Folks,

    Here are my thoughts on this based on my personal experience.

    USCIS should allow porting of dates not just based on approved I-140, but also based on approved LC.

    I applied in EB3 category back in 2003. My labor was stuck in BEC and my career wasn't progressing. So I decided to switch my employers and start the process all over again. Just before I left my previous LC was approved. I wish that process should have allowed me to port the PD of my first labor because PD is decided when you file LC and not when you file I-140. So right now I've EB2 with 2007 PD. I missed the July 07 bus as well.

    Was this fair? perhaps not. Am I having heartburn, not really. I'm happy that I made the switch and moved to the new employer with a better career path.



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  • sk2006
    06-06 01:31 AM
    .. nothing on innovation and technology and more Family based immigrants on welfare and low paid jobs... Do you still think, thing of past holds good now?

    I agree.





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  • jonty_11
    04-09 10:59 AM
    What is IV's position on this bill?





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  • hopefulgc
    08-07 12:57 PM
    Lion could go to Canada (Alberta anyone?). I hear they would atleast accept him as a Cheetah(canadian PR) or a mountain lion.
    Its a different thing that he would have absolutely nothing to hunt up there (read.. no jobs) and he will probably languish up in the snow competing with polar bears to score seals who are too lazy to move :D:D


    Now worst thing is that Lion can not change his job profile till he gets the green card. He will be forced to act like a monkey so that it matches with his monkey job profile mentioned in his PERM application. All he can hope for is to invoke AC21 after couple of years to join a new zoo, that too on a similar job profile. :D:D Gurus what are the Lion's options at this point of time?? :D:D:

    Irony is that if our Lion stays in USA on monkey visa for couple of years, and finally goes back to India, his Lion skills will be obsolete, and Indian zoo's will not entertain a Lion acting like a monkey. Our poor Lion is totally doomed. :D:D





    Macaca
    09-29 04:06 PM
    A Day in the Life: Restaurateurs Hit the Hill (http://rollcall.com/issues/53_34/news/20220-1.html) By Anna Palmer | ROLL CALL, September 27, 2007

    Like hundreds of Washington, D.C., trade associations that shuttle their members to town every year for a bit of precious face time with lawmakers and staff, the National Restaurant Association has its once-a-year shot at putting a live face on its most pressing concerns.

    On Wednesday, the NRA was ready. Its 700 delegates, who had spent the day before at the Grand Hyatt prepping their talking points, fanned out over the Capitol for 332 meetings, including some 284 lawmakers.

    That may seem like an extraordinary show of force. But restaurant owners, like real estate agents and bankers and even florists, all share something in common: a powerful membership presence in every Congressional district.

    Still, the results of the day, like many constituent experiences, were decidedly mixed, as the restaurateurs touched on some of Congress' most sensitive subjects: comprehensive immigration reform, food safety and lowering the number of years it takes to depreciate their buildings.

    Members arrived by state associations and tended to concentrate on their state delegations.

    For the Pennsylvania group, 8 a.m. Wednesday was go time. With 20 restaurateurs swarming the Capitol, they were meeting once again with Sen. Arlen Specter (R-Pa.), whom they see as an ally on immigration reform, and freshman Sen. Bob Casey (D-Pa.), a first for many of them. That's in addition to 14 of the 19 Members of the Pennsylvania Congressional delegation.

    Arming themselves with the facts that restaurants are the second-largest private-sector employer, the 2,100-member association wanted answers, mainly about immigration and what Congress is going to do.

    As the lobbyists mingled outside Casey's office, for many it was a time to reacquaint themselves with old friends and competitors. Most were loose; they weren't novices on Capitol Hill. They've been here before and were ready to get right to the point.

    Led by state President James Flanigan, an intense, impeccably dressed man who has spent his entire career in the food service industry, the group was realistic about their role in national politics.

    "The NRA is like the NFL. [The state restaurant associations] are all the backups of the NFL," said Joseph DiSalvo, owner of DiSalvo's Station Restaurant and incoming president of the state association, as they waited in the hallway to meet with Casey.

    But while lobbying here is important, the Pennsylvania association, which is headquartered in in the state capital, Harrisburg, sees its role as more intimately involved in state-level politicking than federal.

    "Our mission is Harrisburg," said Flanigan. "They can do a lot more damage to us."

    Currently, for example, the city of Philadelphia is deciding whether to require trans-fat labeling on menus, which Flanigan describes as "feel-good legislation" that doesn't really work, and Allegheny County, which includes Pittsburgh, which is considering a 10 percent drink tax.

    "More and more issues are driven down from the federal to the state and now the local level" Patrick Conway, the state association's top staffer, said.

    The group also is dealing with a proposed statewide smoking ban, which it favors. But, the restaurant industry hit a roadblock earlier this year after the tavern association and casinos lobbied heavily for exemptions.

    "My own opinion is I hate the government telling me what to do," said Flanigan, of the smoking ban. "But exemptions put us at a competitive disadvantage. It's the old story of leveling the playing field."

    After filing into the office adjacent to Casey's main entrance in the Russell building, the group settled in around a long boardroom table, with others perched around the walls.

    But there's no Casey. Instead, the lobbyists had to make due with a staffer who works on many of the issues, including immigration reform.

    The group has been prepped by lobbyists from the D.C. office of the National Restaurant Association to stay on their talking points: immigration reform, food safety and the restaurant depreciation tax.

    "For immigration the primary goal is to express our frustration with the inability of Congress to tackle this obviously significant issue," said Brendan Flanagan, the NRA's vice president of federal relations, in an interview.

    Bill Baker, an NRA board member and Pennsylvania restaurateur, led off the discussion, pointing to how comprehensive immigration reform is important not only to their bottom line, but also in making sure employers are on the right side of the law.

    He followed up with horror stories of under-staffed restaurants that can only seat half the restaurant because there aren't enough workers.

    Baker's frustration is echoed by fellow association members, including Michael Passalacqua, former state association president and owner of Angelo's Italian restaurant in Washington, Pa.

    "We are not document experts," Passalacqua said. "The only way the restaurant industry is going to be staffed is a matter of stealing each other's employees."

    With just minutes left before the staffer had to exit for another meeting, the delegates had little time to address food safety and depreciation.

    As the lobbyists left Casey's office, many are frustrated about not getting more specific answers about when immigration reform is going to happen. But, they held out hope for Specter, whom they see as a real advocate on immigration reform.

    After trucking to the Hart Senate Office Building, the delegation was led into Specter's office for the much-anticipated meeting. For many of the delegates who have been attending the national conference for many years, it wasn't the first time they've met with the Senator.

    Less than 10 minutes after Specter joined them, they exited the meeting and frustration from some of the members mounted.

    Even Conway, the state association chief executive who so far has kept a stiff upper lip all morning helping coordinate the delegates and keep everyone on message, diplomatically explained that Specter "didn't have much time."

    But with the meeting so short, and no one from the delegation given the opportunity to ask a single question, others are slightly more frazzled.

    "The time frame was just so small, we couldn't get any information. I'm disappointed because I had a lot questions. There's no time with only 10 minutes," Passalacqua said.





    a_yaja
    05-17 07:20 AM
    You have no arguments that make sense. You are arguing that doing something illegal is a great thing to do. Not so. And yes, I do support the bill as it will weed out some fraudsters from amongst us, who give the H-1B program a very bad rep.
    You still have not told me why you are support the Durbin-Grassley bill and you are OK with consulting on a "full-time" basis. The Durbin-Grassley bill bans this.
    The present laws are more then enough to go after offenders. The law is not being enforced. What makes you think that if the Durbin-Grassley bill is passed, all abuse will stop? People who abuse the system will continue to do so. They will simply say that the job is "permanant, full-time" or whatever the bill requires the job definition to be and file for H1B. And the show will go on. I guess at that point you will then dance when someone else will propose another bill to restrict H1Bs to some other sector that includes you.



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